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A major fast-food restaurant has just introduced a new burger called: "The Angry Burger". Seriously. Evidently, it is a burger full of hot seasonings like onions, peppers and a hot sauce. So, this begs the question: What other emotion-themed or crazy-themed burgers will they … [Read more...]
I just do not understand grocery stores. When I read the sign “Express Lane: ten items or less,” I was under the impression that this was a lane for people in a hurry. I was clearly mistaken. This is a lane for people who cannot count. It seemed simple enough—ten items or less. … [Read more...]
The phone rang— I made an em-dash for it. A man was on the line. He said he had colon problems. I told him I was an editor, not a proctologist. He said that was swell, and he'd be right over. He showed up at the office with a preposition for me. I said, is that a pen in your … [Read more...]
As AIG sells its buildings and divisions to pay back Uncle Sam, a recently laid-off employee, who claims to have only received half of his million dollar bonus, is raising funds by publishing the internal memos of soon-to-be-former CEO Edward Liddy. The following is a Kindle … [Read more...]
My bare feet were making a funny “Rrrip-Rrrip” sound as I walked across the carpet. Looking down, I discovered the edges of my heels resembled barnacles, and it was these crustaceans that were snagging the broadloom like Velcro. Since I am a true do-it-yourselfer, I checked to … [Read more...]