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Doesn’t “golden years” seem like a stretch of the imagination? The “rusty years” might be more appropriate. Like the tin man in the Wizard of Oz, I feel like every joint in my body needs a lube job. As I age, various parts of my body are taking a turn visiting the doctor. With … [Read more...]
I need to schedule another HR consultation. The situation grows increasingly dire with each passing day. I’m referring to inappropriate language, touching, and even nudity. I’m referring to blatant insubordination, and untenable working conditions. As per your earlier … [Read more...]
Our economy is in bad shape and we're leaving the tab open for our future generation to pick up. Congress is spending its way out of a recession by writing I.O.U.’s to China and simultaneously writing U.O.Me’s to a bunch of insolvent embryos in the fetal position needing to take … [Read more...]
Title: Scientific Analysis of Trajectories and Aerodynamics of Stuffed Toys as Hurled by Recumbent Passenger Seat Apparatus in Mini-Van. Authors: Dad (Supervisor, Range Safety Officer), Kid #1 (male) (Launch Control Officer), Kid #2 (female) (Projectile Loader/Chief … [Read more...]
The phone rang— I made an em-dash for it. A man was on the line. He said he had colon problems. I told him I was an editor, not a proctologist. He said that was swell, and he'd be right over. He showed up at the office with a preposition for me. I said, is that a pen in your … [Read more...]