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(The effects of salad dressing on the last 20,000 years) In case you haven't heard, you're not you anymore. Nobody is who they were anymore, because after 23,000 years of just sitting around aligning all over the place, all the Zodiac stars have moved. This is the type of … [Read more...]
The last time we peeked inside the refrigerator the light was off and a coup de food was underway. The cheese, yogurt, and luncheon meat on the third shelf were conspiring to take over the top shelf, where Moo Milk, OJ and a silent Angus Beef enjoyed a prime piece of real … [Read more...]
For years, Conservatives have complained that the U.S. Government Budget is so vast that no-one person knows what it contains. Last week officials of Washington’s Office of Management of Budget (OMB) confirmed that suspicion when they announced that a homeless man had been found … [Read more...]
Cousin Dweezil remembers when we used to snicker at the sounds old people’s bodies made. It’s not so funny anymore. “After all that weeding yesterday, when I move, it sounds like a bowl of Rice Krispies after one pours the milk,” she moaned the other day. “It doesn’t hurt but it … [Read more...]
It’s 9 o’clock at night. The TV glows. None of my favorite shows are on, it’s too early to go to bed, and the images of lions and hyenas on the Discovery channel have planted a seed in my brain. “Time for a nibble” I think. No, not that kind, and my wife has left the room … [Read more...]