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If you're reading this, the Mayan Long Count Calendar reset on December 21, 2012 and the prophesied end-of-world disasters didn't happen. Or maybe they did happen, and another version of you is here in one of those theorized infinite number of almost-identical multiple universes, … [Read more...]
In retrospect, instead of dropping $900 on my first car, it would have been easier (and cheaper) to simply walk up to all the attractive girls in my high school, one at a time, and tell them I was gay. It certainly couldn’t have hurt my chances any worse than my 1984 Buick … [Read more...]
Undaunted by the millions of comments on Yahoo proving that everything that could be said about a topic has already been said by someone, or the T-shirt that says, “What makes you think I want to hear from your T-shirt when I don’t want to hear from you?” I zealously enter the … [Read more...]
A. Anacin episode: The huge headache you get when being informed that the factory where you have slogged for the past thirty-two years is closing down because the labor is cheaper in Tijuana, Mexico. B. Bloomingdale moment: When you suddenly realize the exact same raincoat that … [Read more...]
I won't mention any names, but someone I'm married to has been known to misplace his glasses occasionally. I used be smug about this. I wore glasses or contacts since I was a child and I never misplaced them. That's because I never took them off. At my first childhood eye exam, … [Read more...]