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The day of the wedding finally came. It seemed like a lifetime had gone into this moment; actually my entire life had gone into this day. I was beautiful, Sally, my maid of honor, was enchanting and the whole church was filled with well-wishers. There was a knock at the door. I … [Read more...]
A recent conversation with a nutritionist yielded the following dietary conundrum. According to her I was eating too much starch, equal to a cup of sugar a day, and thus could hire myself out as a Japanese beetle trap. I was eating too much starch on the recommendation of another … [Read more...]
One of the many safety devices that Laura begged me to install, was the oven guard. This is one that I snapped to attention and put into place on my first chance. Why this particular child safety device is so important is it shields the one and a half year old Carter, the … [Read more...]
I’ve been married for four years — all to the same woman. But if I want to keep her around, I need to look less like a clothes hanger and more like those cabana boys my wife, Kelli, drools over. I need some muscles, pronto. That’s why, after sharing my sob story with the good … [Read more...]
Help! I am trapped in a fast-food line and I can't get out! I'm running late for work -- again -- so I whipped into this drive-through to snatch up a quick lunch to take with me. Life in the fast lane. But here I sit four minutes later. Had I stopped to smell the roses outside … [Read more...]