As a young Air Force cop, I was working hospital security one night when I got called to the emergency room to help two male nursing techs take a body down to the morgue. A man had been in a car accident and gone through the windshield. The body was covered up, of course, but the … [Read more...]

I need to vent. Since I married my husband and part-time nemesis twelve long years ago, I have frequently found his chewed gum stuck in various places around the house; for example: on the bottom of my dinner plates, on the margarine container lid, on the bathroom sink, on the … [Read more...]

This weekend is the annual Burt family ham decorating and sculpting contest, otherwise known as The Hammy. I don't like to brag, but I won the 2010 Hammy Award last year. I carved up my ham to look like Curly from the Three Stooges, but with a mohawk (hamhawk?). I think what gave … [Read more...]

Upon deciding they had way too much money and life in their English mansion was getting monotonous, Brits Peter and Constance decided to move to the bowels of Mongolia. The day in and day out of servants at their beck and call was tiresome. All they had to do was summon Edward or … [Read more...]