"AMERICA'S FUNNIEST HUMOR!"TM SHOWCASE
Check Out Our Humor Writing Contest Results!
Congratulations to the Winners, Finalists, Semi-Finalists & Honorable Mentions in our
1st Quarter 2013
Writing Contest!
Click any headline below to see the full entry, then scroll up or down to see other entries in the group.
All entries are carefully reviewed based on our exclusive "H-U-M-O-R"SM judging criteria:
- H = Humor -- Does it make us laugh?
- U = Universality -- Is it fairly "clean"?
- M = Moxie -- Does it have plenty of zing?
- O = Originality -- Is it fresh and new?
- R = 'Riting -- Is it well-'ritten?
(OK, "Writing," but we couldn't judge entries on their "H-U-M-O-W", could we?)
You, too, can get in on the fun, get published and win your share of $250.00 in prize money!
Enter "America's Funniest Humor"TMWriting Contest to claim (or regain) a spot in our Humor Showcase!
Join The Fun! Enter Our Humor Writing Contest Today!
1st Quarter 2013 WINNERS...
(CLICK ANY TITLE TO SEE ENTRY)
The Colonoscopy
By David Woodside,
The colonoscopy is the butt of many jokes, yet the colon is full of laughing matter. The facts: A normal adult colon is five feet
Letter I Probably Won't Send
By Abby Heugel,
To the Man in front of me at the Dollar Store buying a fake rose, chapstick, K-Y Jelly and three servings of Armour potted meat:
If I Only Had A Brain -- Or Two
By Patrick "Patch" Rose,
My son made me a brain in art class. Yeah, so now I have two. Brains, that is. When I’m counting sons, I have three.
My Ticket To Paradise
By Leigh Ann Northcutt,
January 2, 2016
Just because I am a wife, mother and homemaker, don't assume that I haven't tiptoed on the wild side of life. I have. I have
Peace, Love, and Grilling
By Mike McHugh,
If there’s one passion that guys the world over share, it’s barbecuing. Ever since our prehistoric male ancestors discovered fire, we’ve taken pleasure in the
1st Quarter 2013 FINALISTS...
(IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER BY AUTHOR)
Nooner
By Rebecca Dolence,
I don’t remember when Nooners became formal. It used to start with a cocktail and small talk. Now, I have to fill out piles of
“What Are You Waiting For?”
By Joel Habush,
“What Are You Waiting For?” Honestly, I really don’t know. But for years, that question has been asked of me, shouted at me, implored of
The Perkins Two-Step
By Christopher Hivner,
I went to Perkins with siblings to celebrate our Mom’s 85th birthday. The service was so slow that by the time we left she was
Retirement Tips For The Pope
By David Margolis,
I was glad to hear of your retirement and I want to congratulate you on your decision. I was surprised that no pope had retired
Cyberspace Swaps Symbols For Words: #trending
By Patrick "Patch" Rose,
‘At’ – the two-letter combination originates from humble beginnings as a simple word that required a quick couple hits to the computer keyboard. I grew
Herb's Cooking While Rosemary Simmers
By Peter Quinn,
Cinnamon the dog barked as Rosemary rooted herself to the chair after boiling into Herbs’ office. “Herb do you know what thyme it is?” She
1st Quarter 2013 SEMI-FINALISTS...
(IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER BY AUTHOR)
Parakeetish For Dummies
By Crystie Cook,
When people ask who wears the pants in the family, most answers are “The Man” or “The Woman.” In our household, however, the true answer—which
Filling Up On The Super Bowl
By Mitch Graham,
Somewhere between two hours of pre-game coverage and halftime of the Super Bowl, my satellite TV receiver informed me it was about to automatically turn
How To Speak Foreign
By Joel Habush,
Before we get to “How,” let’s first address “Why,” and “Which Language.” In many people’s lives, there comes a time when they decide to learn
1st Quarter 2013 HONORABLE MENTIONS...
(IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER BY AUTHOR)
Congratulations To EVERYONE Who Entered!
If your entry was not recognized this time, please don't give up! Writing humor is a specialized craft, and it takes time and effort to master any craft.
- Some entries were well-written, but needed more work setting up the humor and punching up the punch lines. Try structuring your work with distinct set-ups and punch lines throughout the piece.
- Other entries had plenty of punch, but relied on coarseness or vulgarity, which limited their potential readership. Try writing as if your piece were for a daily newspaper to achieve the most universal appeal.
However, just by entering you made a great effort and we commend you for it! (You already did better than those who just thought about entering, but didn't even try!)
We hope you will enter again and look forward to seeing more of your work!
Enjoy more award-winning humor in our exclusive Humor Showcase:
Winners | Finalists | Semi-Finalists | Honorable Mentions
Like to see your name in print? Love to rant and rave about your favorite topics? Channel that creative energy by entering our humor writing contests!
ENTER HUMORPRESS.COM'S HUMOR WRITING CONTEST!
Have Fun! Get Published! Win Cash Prizes!SM
- Entries should be 750 words or less.
- $250.00 in total cash prizes will be awarded. Five winners will be named.
- Winners, Finalists/Semi-Finalists & Honorable Mentions will be published online! Selections also may appear in optional print edition(s) with no book purchase required!
- Entry Fee is only $10, So Don't Miss Out. Enter Today!
- Multiple entries are allowed, including your columns previously published elsewhere. Each entry must include an entry fee.
- Book purchase is optional and is not required for entry.
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