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"AMERICA'S FUNNIEST HUMOR"TM SHOWCASE

June/July 2005 Humor Writing Contest Results!

Congratulations to the Honorable Mentions of our June/July 2005 Humor Writing Contest!

On The Move and On The Take. When News Breaks, We Fix It

By Michael Pollick

Whenever I happen to be in a new city on vacation, I inevitably wind up watching at least one local news program. You’d think this would create a sense of continuity — they have news in Iowa, we have news in Alabama. But I actually feel even more disoriented, as if I were listening in on someone else’s dirty little secrets.

“Stuckeyville police arrested Clem Foster of Dogpile Flats for indecent exposure and illegal possession of fireworks today…” I just know some local viewer is shaking her head and muttering ‘Oh, that Foster boy. He just ain’t right. Got himself all naked with those …

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