How many times has this happened to you? You’re standing at a crowded cocktail party. You have a drink in one hand, and an appetizer on a plate in the other. You want to eat the appetizer but you can’t because you don’t have a free hand.
Or maybe you’re driving your car with your left hand on the steering wheel while your right hand is holding your cell phone to your ear. You want nothing more than to sip the coffee in your travel mug while it’s still hot, but you can’t without hanging up on your mother-in-law or driving into a ditch.
In the past, your appetizer and coffee would turn cold and there would be nothing you could do about it. But today is different. Today the future has arrived with ExtraArm!
ExtraArm is the miracle new third arm implant from Prosthsessories, LLC. ExtraArm is attached to your upper torso and fused to your central nervous system, just like the two arms you already have. Within minutes after surgery, your ExtraArm will be moving the way you want it to move. Within days, ExtraArm will feel like just another part of you.
ExtraArm gives you the ability to juggle your hectic life—literally. In our state-of-the-art laboratory, ExtraArm testers were able to juggle as many as six pairs of tube socks, plus newborn twins and a tuna casserole, all at the same time! How’s that for multi-tasking?
But don’t just take our word for it. Let’s hear from a satisfied ExtraArm customer:
“I’ve had ExtraArm for over a month now and I can’t imagine how I lived without it. At the office computer, I used to type, stop and click the mouse, and then start typing again. I didn’t realize how slow and inefficient that was until I got ExtraArm. Now I can type and click without missing a beat and I get my reports done in half the time. Thanks, Prosthsessories!”
–Judy, financial analyst, Tacoma, Washington
It’s not just those with office jobs who are thrilled with ExtraArm. We’ve heard rave reviews from people from all walks of life, from dog-walkers to dishwashers, from house painters to heart surgeons. Everyone loves the ExtraArm at work!
And when you’re ready for some fun, you’ll be glad you have ExtraArm. Let’s hear from Steve:
“I loved playing sports with my buddies, but I just wasn’t very good. In hockey, I played goalie and they called me “Steve the Sieve.” In baseball, I was the worst fielder on the team. With ExtraArm, everything changed. Wearing two baseball mitts, I snagged every ground ball. And in hockey, well, now they call me “Sure-handed Steve.” Thanks, Prosthsessories!”
-Steve, bricklayer, Poughkeepsie, New York
Steve, when you and your friends go the bar afterwards, go ahead and have a beer or three and have fun. Take it from us: you will never lose another game of foosball.
When the ExtraArm isn’t enough, you can upgrade to ExtraArm Extreme! Extreme is double-jointed at the elbow, wrist, and knuckles. You know that part of the middle of your back you can never quite scratch? You can now, with ExtraArm Extreme.
Wait, there’s more! If you call within the next 10 minutes, we will include ExtraFinger absolutely free. Yes, your new arm can come with six fingers, pre-installed! Whether you want to play the piano like no one else or just get a better grip on life, ExtraArm with ExtraFinger is for you.
We hope you will call now and join the thousands of Prosthsessories customers who can handle all of life’s challenges. With ExtraArm, they live with triple the confidence, and so can you.
“ExtraArm: When Two Arms Are Not Enough”
If you experience any of the following symptoms after attachment of ExtraArm, contact your doctor immediately: dry mouth, indigestion, nausea, headaches, tingling in extremities, fever, hives, loss of appetite, loss of sleep, shortness of breath, bruising, enlarged lymph nodes, stroke, heart attack, pulmonary embolism, erectile dysfunction, gangrene or severe, shooting pain in the torso.
Prosthsessories assumes no liability for any complications, conditions, injuries or fatalities associated with ExtraArm, ExtraArm Extreme, and ExtraFinger.
Prosthsessories, a Limited Liability Corporation.