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"AMERICA'S FUNNIEST HUMOR"TM SHOWCASE

August/September 2005 Humor Writing Contest Results!

Congratulations to the Honorable Mentions of our August/September 2005 Humor Writing Contest!

Stupidity, The Bane Of All Parents

By Lisa Barker

When it comes to parenting pet peeves, one thing most parents can’t stand is stupidity in children.

I’m not talking about the usual brainless things that happen around the house that you EXPECT with children, things like spilled milk, kids lolling all over the sofa instead of sitting like regular human beings, clothes that never make it two feet to the hamper, and a myriad of half-baked chores that never quite get done; things you have to stand over children and cite the obvious, repeatedly, all so they can ignore you and continue on in blissful ignorance.

I’m talking about DUMB things… like walking through the house with a plastic bat whacking yourself in the head over and over and over. That’s my one year old. (Bonk!) “Ow.” (Bonk!) “Ow.” (Bonk!) “Ow.” I have to take the bat away before he …

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