Unemployed? Tired of writing the same old thing: “You will see by my attached resume that I’m well-suited for yada, yada, yada”? Ever wonder if anyone is really on the other end of those torturous applications?
It’s time to shake things up. Make people notice you.
11 ways to make the job applications process more interesting for you AND them:
1.Write your resume backwards so the recruiter can only read it in a mirror.
2.Attach pictures of your tattoos to your cover email.
3.Attach pictures of your pet alligator.
4.Attach pictures of your pet alligator’s tattoos
5.Start your email with: “I’m right behind you and you smell fantastic!”
6.Attach the crime scene photos about what happened to the last person who didn’t hire you.
7.Use a different font for every word in your resume and cover letter giving it the look of a ransom note.
8.Type everything in pig Latin. “Ou-yay ill-way ee-say y-bay y-may attached-way esume-ray at-thay I-way am-way ell-way uited-say or-fay.”
9.For your contact address put: United States Penitentiary Administrative Maximum Facility (ADX), aka: Supermax, Florence, CO, Attention: Solitary Confinement
10.Type in Morse code: “.-.. / … . . / -… -.– / — -.– / .- – – .- -.-. …. . -.. / .-. . … ..- — . .-.-.- .-.-.- .-.-.-“ and attach the link for the translator: