First, let it be known I love sports. Don’t you just hate it when someone starts off with a disclaimer? Guess that’s one of my annoying traits. My wife can list the other 52. But I digress. That’s number 16 on the list.
Anyway, the two most annoying habits take place in baseball and football. So I don’t expect to be presented with any free tickets to either the World Series or the Super Bowl.
The first one I’d like to address is in baseball. A player, let’s call him Manuel (a pretty common name in the sport these days) hits a home run. As he rounds the bases he enthusiastically and egotistically thrusts his pointed finger towards heaven. He’s so full of himself he actually thinks God, if in fact there is one, actually took time out of his busy and probably stressful day to make sure Manuel hit a four bagger. I guess Manuel assumes that God says “ I realize there’s a plane in trouble over Denver, a Tsunami is about to hit Japan, an asteroid the size of the Empire State Building is headed towards the Empire State Building and the Kardashion’s show could be in trouble, but I’ve first got to make sure Manuel has a great at bat.” Manuel may even thrust his pointed finger (take note Miley) to heaven once more as he crosses home plate just to insure that the all powerful deity will grant him his wish next time he’s at bat. Interestingly enough, when he strikes out he doesn’t point to the ground. Guess he gives the devil a pass on this one.
The other annoying antic takes place in football. I cringe when a player scores a touchdown and then proceeds to gyrate wildly as his knees keep a knockin’, his toes keep a rockin’ and his arms keep a flailin’ until he resembles a spastic flamingo. I say, score a touchdown with some professionalism and a hint of good sportsmanship. If you want to cross the goal like you’re Fred Astair on crack, go on Dancing With The Stars…or Dancing With The Almost Stars, as I like to call it.
Now that I’ve no doubt angered some pro athletes and their fans to the point where they’re considering taking my first born, who by the way is in his early forties, I’m turning on the Knicks game. Doesn’t it just bug you when they execute a dunk than hang from the bask…oops.