Exercising regularly is an easy way of increasing your chances of having a long, healthy life. This is terrific news, considering that recent studies suggest that living is one of the top priorities for humans, behind checking our email. Besides general health, there are many other reasons why people like to stay in shape. For instance, one of the main reasons guys try to keep their bodies fit is because they are overly concerned with women judging them. Conversely, one of the main reasons women try to keep their bodies fit is because they are overly concerned with women judging them. As a result of these very rational lines of thinking, many people go to great lengths to exercise consistently.
The only problem with working out regularly is that it takes time. Between eating meals, standing in line at Starbucks, eating dessert, and lying on the couch eating chips, who can possibly find the time to get over to the gym for a workout? Fortunately if you are someone who hasn’t been able to fit exercise into your schedule yet, there is still time for you to start a workout routine before your body evolves into an amorphous blob. But before you go over to the gym, there are a few things you should know to help improve your aerobic adventure.
Before even entering the gym, be sure that you are dressed appropriately. I’ve found that the most popular clothing line seen in the gym is from Baby Gap. By squeezing into clothes that are several sizes too small, you can instantly make your muscles grow without even doing anything! It is also a good idea to wear a shirt with some inspirational message on it to pump you up. Shirts that say “Go Hard or Go Home”, “Lift Like Your Hair is On Fire”, and “I Eat Babies”, are all very good choices if you want amp up the intensity of the weight room.
Prior to your workout, make sure to get a good stretch in. You don’t want to throw out your back while performing an intense athletic movement, such as bending over at the water fountain (don’t worry, the doctors say I should be fine in a couple of months). After stretching, you may want to hit up the weight room for some “Arm Farm”. Those pythons of yours need to be fed, so make sure to do plenty of bicep curls. In between sets it is absolutely vital that you discreetly flex your muscles in front of the mirror, thinking about what a fool Becky was for dumping you.
After an extreme session of grunting and lifting waits, you should probably get some good cardio in. One popular option is to sign up for exercise classes, like “pilates”. These “wellness classes” involve a group of people trying to repeat the movements of a much more flexible and attractive instructor, all while in a room covered with mirrors to constantly remind everyone of how out of shape they are.
If you would prefer, you can either go for a nice jog outside, or you could try a treadmill. Personally, I now prefer to run on a treadmill rather than on an outdoor path because I’ve grown tired of watching mothers pass me while pushing a stroller. The treadmill can be pretty tricky, however. Treadmills nowadays are very technologically advanced, with a control panel similar to that of a 747, only with more buttons. First, you must decide between unique running settings, each specifically designed to help you accomplish whatever your aerobic goal may be. Before hopping on the treadmill, make sure you know which of these settings is right for you: “Weight Loss”, “Burn Fat”, or “Lose Weight”. After deciding on one of these options, you can fine-tune your treadmill to your liking. These fancy treadmills allow you to control all variables that affect your running, like speed, incline, gravitational pull of the earth, etc.
Once you start working out, it is important to keep it up. If you want to get the most out of your workouts, you must be committed to getting to the gym on a regular basis. Working out gets more fun as you go along, so don’t give up on it too soon. Plus, do you really want to show Becky that she was right when she said that you have a problem with commitment? I know I sure don’t.