Being over 50 I have come to the conclusion that “being nice” is waaaaaaay over-rated. Sometimes I dream about giving a scorpion as a present. Why not? It’s for an ex boss that has everything. I know what your thinking. Yes, I would have it gift wrapped with a matching bow. I’m not that callous.

There are people I no longer want to be around except for what is absolutely necessary. I bet you have some in your family or “friend of a friend” circle too. I have an internal “nice” meter and sometime I just run out of “minutes.” No “rollover minutes” either. When I’m done, I politely make up a lie and go home. The fact that I lie and make up stories might surprise you. One thing I learned in nursing: Therapeutic Fabrication is not lying. It brings peace on earth and goodwill to all.

I used to journal when I didn’t feel like being “nice.” I don’t have time to do all that long hand writing about someone that causes me pain and suffering. It contributes to my carpal tunnel syndrome. I have found a convenient check list letter that helps me to channel my seriously not nice feelings.

Acceptance Letter:
This letter is not to be sent. If you do send this, your acceptance may possibly be ( circle one)
• Irrevocable
• Irreplaceable
• A Broadway hit musical
• Irreversible
• Thrown back in your face at the speed of light

Dear (circle one)
• Thighs
• Daughter/son ( or any variation of)
• Ex( boyfriend,girlfriend,other:)
• Mom/Dad
• Boss
• Engagement ring
• Religious leader
• Mother-law, Father in Law
• Expensive meal
• Expensive so- called- trip- of- a- lifetime
• Family pet
• Pet rock
1987 Mustang
• Other::::

This letter is for me and is my declaration of acceptance.

I am done harboring ill feelings toward you as( circle as many as you need)
• An inanimate object of my desire
• A Person that I gave birth to
• A Person that owes me money
• Car that broke down
• A person that I wed
• A family that I wed into
• Pet that I rescued and didn’t want in the first place
Body Part:::
• Other::::

The energy it takes to harbor these negative emotions has (circle all that apply)
• Given me hemorrhoids
• Given me extreme flatulence
• Given me Heartache
• Depleted my bank account
• Over extended my karma warantee
• Ruined my diet
• Made my drug dealer thank me profusely
• Fed the proverbial “ elephant in the living room” more than peanuts
• Made my blood pressure go sky high
• Other::::_

Accepting the fact that ( circle one: you or it,) didn’t meet my dreams or expectations, I realize I can learn to ( circle one: love, wash, feed, pray for,stalk, work for) you in an entirely different way.

Feeling out of control has a lot to do with acceptance. With that said, I realize what I do have control over in our relationship is. (Circle All that apply):
• Unconditional love
• My bank account
• My chocolate intake
• Spending time with you( or not)
• Taking you to the vet
• Taking you to the cleaners
• Watering you
• Listening to you whine( or not)
• Other::::_

I am in the process of appreciating you in a new way. The rate at which I am doing this may be compared to( circle one)
• A bat out of hell
• Slow as molasses in February
• Being shot out of a canon
• Taking 1 step forward and 2 steps backward
• a centipede putting on shoes
• Other:::_

Please accept my apology for not realizing how my ‘ non acceptance “ has affected you. I know I have been angry and it has manifested toward you.. In the future I will;

• Listen to you. However, your anger needs to be discussed with a trained: (circle one)
Professional wrestler, therapist, dog whisperer, pharmaceutical rep

• Take my medicine as prescribed
• Talk calmly with you
• Drink and meditate or drink and medicate before we see each other or

• Walk you before meals
• Say “Thank You” more often
• Not offer you money or things
Reconnect the spark plugs
• Clean up my needles and drug paraphernalia
• Share my chocolate
• Tell you up front how much I have for “ bail money”
• Other::::_

I also accept that these conditions of acceptance and apology may not be suitable for you ( circle one):
• For now
• Ever
• When pigs fly
• You have got to be kidding!
• Rot in jail you bastard!

With love and new beginnings,
Name:::::__

I hope this journal check list helps you. I’m sharing only because I have a few minutes left on my nice meter.