[Council Officers: Nicholas, Terry, Sybil; Rabble-rousers: Tibbs, Polly; Full bladder: Audrey]

Nicholas: “The first meeting of the Council will now come to order.”

Tibbs: “Order what? Take-out?”

Polly: “I have been craving Thai.”

Tibbs: “What about fish?”

Polly: “Who delivers fish?”

Sybil: “Order. Organized. ‘Come to order’ means stop squawking and pay attention.”

Polly: “Will there be any snacks?”

Audrey: “I have to go.”

Tibbs: “Go where?”

Audrey: “No, I have to GO.”

Nicholas: “There will be no snacks. This council will now come to order.”

Tibbs: “Order what?”

Terry: “Sssh.”

Nicholas: “The first item of business is electing Council officers. I will accept nominations for the offices of Chair, Vice-Chair, and Secretary.”

Polly: “Ooh! Pick me!”

Tibbs: “Why you?”

Polly: “I want an office! And a chair!”

Tibbs: “Audrey! Audrey could be an office!”

Sybil: “R.”

Tibbs: “R?”

Sybil: “Office-R. Officer.”

Audrey: “Maybe later.”

Tibbs: “Do you nominate someone to be a chair or be in chair? I don’t see how we could elect someone to be a chair. I nominate Nicholas to be in a chair!”

Nicholas: “There has been a motion to nominate me to be an officer of the Council. Do I hear a second?”

Tibbs: “A second what?”

Polly: “A second nomination, I guess. I nominate Sybil too!”

Nicholas: “Do I hear a second–Is there anyone else who wants me to be nominated? “

Polly: “Yeah!”

Tibbs: “Totally!”

Nicholas: “And can I have a second for Sybil?

Tibbs: “You can have all day if you want.”

Audrey: “Oh, no.”

Nicholas: “Is there anyone else who wants Sybil to be nominated?”

Tibbs: “Yeah!”

Polly: “Totally!”

Audrey: “I really have to go bad.”

Nicholas: “We need at least one more nomination.”

Tibbs: “What about Terry? He could do it! I nominate Terry to be in a chair!”

Polly: “Where does he stand on the snack issue?”

Terry: “I can do it.”

Nicholas: “Anyone else for Terry?”

Polly: “OK.”

Tibbs: “Yeah, Terry!”

Nicholas: “Are there any other nominations?”

Polly: “Do we get snacks now?”

Audrey: “If this doesn’t end soon I am going to go right here.”

Nicholas: “We will now vote to elect Sybil, Terry, and me to be officers of the council. All in favor, say ‘Aye.’”

All: “Aye!”

Nicholas: “Sybil, Terry, and I have been elected officers of the council. We will take a 10-minute recess.”

Audrey: “Oh, thank God.”

10 minutes later…

Nicholas: “The meeting will come to order…”

Tibbs: “…Chinese!”

Polly: “I love the wonton noodles.”

Terry: “Sssh.”

Nicholas: “The purpose of this meeting is to adopt rules to govern meetings of the Council. I propose that we adopt Robert’s Rules of Order.”

Tibbs: “Who is Robert?”

Sybil: “He devised rules. Of order. For meetings. It is just a way of taking turns so we don’t sound like a bunch of crickets making a racket with their legs.”

Tibbs: “A racquet? With their legs? Do they make tiny little nets too? I would like to see that!”

Polly: “No, a racket. Noise. Din. Hubbub.”

Tibbs: “Who are you calling ‘Bub’, Bub?

Terry: Sssh.

Nicholas: “To start the meeting, the chair calls the meeting to order…”

Tibbs and Polly: “Pizza!”

Nicholas: “Council members can ask the chair to be recognized to speak.” Once everyone has been heard, a member may make a motion to vote. If a majority vote in favor whatever it is that we are considering, the proposal is enacted. If you want to postpone discussion of the issue, you make a motion to Lay on the Table.”

Tibbs: “Table? What happened to the chairs?”

Nicholas: “During the debate, if a member of the assembly has a question for the chair, the member can say, ‘Point of Information.’”

Tibbs: “Point of Information! Why can’t we just say ‘I have a question.’”

Nicholas: “Because that’s the rule. If you think another member is violating the rules, you say, ‘Point of Order.’”

Tibbs: “Point of Order!”

Sybil: “We haven’t adopted the rules yet, so whatever your point is, it’s moot.”

Polly: “That means zip it, turkey breath.”

Nicholas: “A member can also make motions to Appeal the Decision of the Chair.”

Tibbs: “Which would be moot now, right?”

Terry: “Will you just shut up!?!”

Sybil: “I move that we adopt Robert’s Rules of Order for Council meetings.”

Nicholas: “All in favor, say ‘Aye.’”

All: “Aye!”

Nicholas: “All opposed, say ‘Nay.’ The Ayes have it. Robert’s Rules of Order will be in effect from this point forward. We are adjourned.”