Dearest ::::__
It’s been quite a year for the Looney clan. Roger lost his job at the Diatomaceous Earth Institute due to a pervasive soil glut and an over-extended janitorial bonus budget, but after forty-eight weeks of unemployment, he still can’t find gainful employment in the earth industry.
Oh, yes, there are the minimum wage Bunsen burner entry level types, but with Roger’s life-long experience with dirt, he’s not about to “settle.” He still has another fifty-six weeks of benefits, so I guess we’ll muddle through. If anyone knows of anything in soil, keep it to yourself. Ha! Ha!
Roger gave me the most divine anniversary present this year: a diamond studded sweater shaver. When he says, “You have everything,” now it’s really true! Whenever I’m stressed, I just shave away. Don’t know which calms me more, shaving the cashmere or staring at the diamonds (1.5 TCW, F-G/VVS1-2). It’s easy to buy for him. Another Rolex or Patek, I guess. Thank heaven for all those government checks, eh?
As for me, I enjoy staying home. After thirty years in the pickle industry, I deserve it. Besides, Roger says I’ve been pickled enough. It’s humor like that that keeps a marriage fresh. I keep busy making and donating fashion jewelry for earthquake victims. My drusy quartz line is the most popular. Seems to provide some cheer until the Red Cross trucks arrive. I get lots of ideas from those sultry Southern hosts of JTV’s Jewel School. Those gals are gems in my book! 🙂
Thirty-two-year-old son Bruce lives with us and loves all things artsy, especially ballet, painting, interior design, and hairdressing. This year we let him do over our living room in art deco. Up went the Erté prints, and down went the deco doilies. Quite the showplace now. He’s giving me a new “do” for new year’s, a little something he created himself called the “Rotogravure.” He’s entering it in the “Coif of the Year” contest held annually in Phnom Penh, Cambodia. If he wins, he gets a free trip there. His painting,“Mulch at Midnight,” won second place in Hoboken’s Bold New Artist series. All we really want is to find our Brucey a nice girl and get him married off. Seems to have plenty of male friends, just no “Ms. Right” yet. Any suggestions out there?
After his tent leaked and his king-sized air mattress imploded at Occupy Hoboken, our twenty-five-year-old, Dustin Jr. (Roger wanted a “junior,” then forgot when Bruce came along) headed to a Lady Gaga concert. In the parking lot, not the arena. Couldn’t get a ticket, so the enterprising young man stood outside with a lampshade down his skivvies yelling, “Zip-a-dee-doo-dah.” It’s the ADHD. Dustin’s had it since he was ten months. Couldn’t keep his mind on his Gerber’s, and we’ve lived with the surprises and turmoil ever since. Baby Cyndee celebrated her third birthday in October (Boy! Was she a surprise! One of the consequences of marrying at fifteen, I guess). My! The list of gifts she wanted — and got! Her favorites were the electric car, the Wii, the iPhone, and the diamond tennis bracelet with the Justin Bieber carved cameo head charm. Gee! I remember when all I wanted was a doll. How enlightened and progressive we’ve become!
Today’s stuff is so much more stimulating for the developing young mind.
Due to Roger’s job situation, (and the fact that you can’t leave the country for extended periods if you’re collecting unemployment), we had to cut our usual six week European jaunt short this summer. Had only a long weekend so were able to visit only London, Paris, Rome, Madrid, Berlin, Copenhagen, and Athens. It was fun, but I hope next year will allow us our full six weeks. All I can say is, we cut back, now it’s time for Washington to do the same, eh?
Here’s hoping you, the::___ ,our very closest and dearest friend(s), have a great holiday season. Come see us whenever you’re in the trendy Fontenay section of Hoboken. We’ll loll by the indoor heated pool sipping Tanqueray and tonics even in winter. 🙂
Kissy, kissy,
Antoinette, Roger,
Jamie, Dustin,Jr.,
Cyndee, and
Pooch Parker
P.S. Pooch Parker (our Great Dane baby boy) posed for the 2011 Dogs of Distinction calendar. He was Mr. August and now he gets fan mail for heaven’s sake! I think it was the Speedo swimsuit which showed his attributes to the max. BTW, it looks much better on Parker than Roger.:-)