Listener: Nothing like some music on the way to work! {Turns car radio on}
Bob: Gooooooooood morning everybody! Welcome to the 96.5 Wakeup Show with Bob and Kelly!! Today we’ll have contests, trivia, call-ins, promotions, and…something else I’m forgetting right now. Hold on, it’s on the tip of my tongue…
Kelly: Music!
Bob: {Snaps fingers} Right, music! Let’s start by looking at some news headlines! A respected toothpaste company is being sued for accidentally putting sugar in their toothpaste. There’ve been numerous complaints, along with at least one report of an individual having all of their teeth dissolve.
Kelly: How sad.
Bob: Indeed. There’s only one word to describe how I’m feeling.
Kelly: What’s that?
Bob: Crestfallen!
{Cymbal crash, followed by a minute of uncontrolled laughter}
Listener: {Groans}
Bob: Let’s move on to the 96.5 Trivia Challenge! Be caller 465, answer the question, and become eligible to win our grand prize, which is a coffee table we found in the dumpster out back! Here’s today’s question: During the 1988 World Series, who hit the dramatic Game One winning homerun?
Kelly: While we start taking calls, let’s go to a commercial break!
Listener: Stupid contest! I want music!
{Commercial}
Bob: Welcome back! We have caller 465 on the line! Hello, you’re on with Bob and Kelly!
Caller: Hello?
Bob: You’re on with Bob and Kelly!
Caller: Bob and who?
Bob: Bob and Kelly, from the 96.5 Wakeup Show. You’re caller 465!
Caller: Dang, wrong number!
{Dial tone}
Bob: Odd. I guess we’ll have to try again. Be caller 465 to answer our question! Let’s go to another break.
Listener: You’ve got to be kidding me! {Gets out phone}
{Commercial}
Kelly: Welcome back! We now have caller 465 on the line. What’s your guess?
Listener: Kirk Gibson! Now play a song!
Bob: You’re correct, and maybe later! Stay on the line caller, while we go to traffic with Reilly O’Reilly in the 96.5 Traffic Copter. Reilly?
Listener: Aaarrgghh!!!
Reilly: Well, things look pretty good out there this morning, although a stray herd of goats have forced motorists to detour off of Highway 34. Or are they cows? Heck, I can’t tell! We’ll try to get a little closer to find out for sure. Bring it down, Joe! Whoa! Not that low! Pull up you fool, pull up!!! IIIEEEEEEE!!!!!
Bob: Thanks Reilly! That was Reilly O’Reilly with traffic. Remember, watch out for those goats! Or possibly cows! Ha ha! We’ll be right back!
Listener: But I won’t! {Switches station}
Jack: Welcome back to Jack and Christy in the morning! We’re going to get to some music, but first we’d like to tell you about our Luxury Cruise Getaway Sweepstakes! Register today for a small fee at your local Sloppy’s Sloppy Joe and Baked Beans Eatery for your chance to win, or register for free right now by being caller 678! We’ll be right back with today’s winner!
Listener: Of course. {Switches station}
Kelly: Welcome back! We know you’ve all been waiting for this a long time, but don’t worry, your wait is over!!
Listener: Can it be?
Bob: Thaaaaat’s right! It’s time for another round of ‘That’s Weird’, where you tell us the weirdest thing that’s ever happened to you!
Listener: {Bangs head on steering wheel numerous times}
Bob: Let’s see who we have on the line with us today. Hello, you’re on ‘That’s Weird’!
Susie: Like, hello! Like, one time my friend Mindy and I both went to school wearing the exact same outfit! It was, like, so weird because we didn’t even text each other or anything!
Bob: That’s extremely weird! Thanks Susie! We now have the caller who won our trivia challenge, back with us! What’s the weirdest thing that’s ever happened to you?
Listener: One time I was listening to the radio in the morning, AND THEY ACTUALLY PLAYED A SONG!!!!
Bob: Honestly, that’s not very weird. We’ll be right back with the weather!
Listener: {Sobbing} One song! Is it too much to ask?!
{Commercial}
Bob: Welcome back, and now it’s time for Weather with Snowball Willis. Snowball, what’s going on?
Snowball: Well, Bob, what we’ve got here is a high pressure system coming in from the north and a low pressure system coming up from the south. They’ll collide right above us, and frankly, I don’t think anybody will survive.
Kelly: Thanks, Snowball!
Bob: OK folks, it’s time to start off of a Maximum Music Marathon of 50 minutes of uninterrupted music!
Listener: {Arrives at work}.