I went to an UFO convention out of curiosity and a need to see something bizarre. Before I set forth on my journey, I would have categorized it as fringe entertainment along with professional wrestling, Civil War reenactments and lingerie football. I also went with the pre-conceived notion there was going to be a legion of Star Trek fanatics, new age pontificators, alien abductees and people who swear that spaceships are part of an ongoing conspiracy. I was not to be let down when I saw all of the above and more.

The convention was like a mini Mardis Gras. There were plenty of gawkers like myself but there was also a large representation of UFO believers, self-proclaimed experts and attendees in costume. I thought Halloween brought out the ET outfits, but some folks felt inclined to don the big head and bug eyes. In addition, I don’t know why Spock impersonators were there but I am sure Leonard Nimoy was somewhere wishing he got a dollar every time someone flashed the “go in peace and prosper” hand gesture.

Okay, lets review three of the premises presented at the convention. Premise one: aliens abducting people for interrogation. This apparently has been going on many years and there are a growing population making the claim. Premise 2: Aliens have infiltrated themselves into everyday society to report on us. Premise 3: There is a massive government cover up of a lot unidentified aircraft.

Premise 1: Aliens are abducting us. This usually happens in our sleep, and then sent to an unknown location to be interrogated, tortured and probed. It seems to be a common theme to be probed but I can’t imagine why. So the aliens want to stick some sort of magic wand up one of our orifices to find out what going on inside. This doesn’t add up to me because you would think once you probed one you probed them all. Maybe they want to gather some cells to do some cloning. The reason they keep doing this is because they want a variety of slaves to wait on them. Logically it makes a little sense, but the question looms: If these guys traveled all this way to probe us and clone us, you would think they could invent a robot? If I could have a robot slave, put an order in for me.

Premise 2: Aliens are infiltrated into our society. I can accept the fact that aliens have been implanted into society because it could explain a lot unsettling behavior. I am not talking about the folks who are leading their own marching band down the road or the shoppers in Wal-Mart with capes, spandex jumpsuits or silver hot pants, not even the people who get into fistfights on Jerry Springer show. As weird as that behavior may appear, I cannot explain heinous crimes and mayhem. It must be the alien brain misfiring and going bonkers. Maybe they are the quiet and inconspicuous types taking copious notes sitting in coffee shops all day on their laptop.

Premise 3: There is a massive cover up about alien spacecraft and the government has some of this aircraft. Granted there are plenty of visuals out there of unexplained things in the sky but why the cover up? To this day I have not seen one clear, high resolution, slam dunk proof of these aircrafts. Does every picture have to look like it was shot by your drunken uncle at a picnic? Does every video clip have to be shaky or so far away that it could be a paper plate from the same picnic drifting through the sky? If the government is covering up something then that would be a first. Aside from who shot JFK what else hasn’t been disclosed? The government is too big and has too many whistleblowers wanting to cash on their secrets to the National Enquirer.

As you can see I am skeptic and will need a lot more proof to get me to buy in. The alien abduction stories are quite entertaining but I will never believe that an alien being needs to capture us in our pajamas. Nor do I think the government is hiding alien craft to keep us from freaking out or conducting secret missions to Planet Nemrod. But, I do think it is possible that aliens are the ones who run social network sites because they have all of your personal data to indoctrinate us as slaves.